Two more days... and those midterms....

When this 2011 spring semester started, I had always waited for spring. Cold January passed, freezing February is gone, and now I am already in the middle of the March. Two more days left until my "sweet" spring vacations♪ But, now I have to worry about my midterms: I have US History and Pre-calculus tests coming... I'm under huge stress right now....

But, still, I think I have to put more effort for the remaining two days. Well, I'm just thinking of my SPRING vacations. After the midterms, my dad (stepfather XD) promised me to buy two pairs of CONVERSE shoes!!! (the indigo blue and pink color ) But only under one condition - if I get all As.

These days, I am very stressed out from studying, getting good grades, SAT, AP stuffs. I mean anyone whose in high school would feel same as me. But these days, I feel that I am becoming little bit relaxed. My grades are going down and I'm sort of losing the enthusiasm, the passion that I had at the beginning of the freshmen year. I doze off during classes and feel that I just don't want to study: I keep sitting in front of the computing surfing through the Internet.

This is how I feel after I reazlie I have works to do after long hour suring the net...



I used to criticize those people who can't concentrate and study. In fact, I think that I had no right to say so because 2011 Stephanie is kind of becoming THEM. I think I need to put more effort into the academics. I have to stop myself from doing all those unnecessary things. But I have wonder: am I going to succeed it? What would happen if I give up? Sometimes, I dream about myself rejecting from all those colleges I apply. It is a nightmare. Everyday for me is a nightmare.

Maybe during these following two weeks, I need to encourage myself to begin studying hard as I did two years ago. I will try my best to find again that passion, that enthusiasm that I had in studying in 2009.

Now I think I'll have to go and study for the upcoming tests.

Ganbatte Japan.･.･:★

Last Friday, after hanging out with my friend Seo Jin, I went home. When I came in the living room, my mom told me that bunch of waves, Tsunami swallowed the northern part of Japan. I was shocked. I turned the news and began to listen.

The tsunami waves swallowed the Japanese villages; cars flooded, hitting with each other, causing mass eruptions; people escaped into the schools covering their heads with bags or coats. People are terrified with the earthquake. The earthquake was 9.0 magnitude, and the whole world is now concentrated on Japan.

People lost each other: mothers lost their children; friends lost each other; couples separated from each other... (ＴｍＴ)ｳｩｩ･･･  In fact, it is very sad and I feel very sorry for them.

If everything stopped at this point, people have to appreciate the nature. However, even now, the earthquakes continue happening, and seismologists keep warning people of the next tsunami. People can't be relaxed even for one hour: they have to be anxious and worried about their separated family members and friends.



Furthermore,  Reactors No.1, 2, 3, 4 of Fukushima Daiichi Nuclear Power Station in Fukushima suffered the hydrogen explosion; thus people now have to be feared of the radiation... (;д;) 

I mean, all of these things happened just at once... like in some kind of miserable novel...

To say the truth, my friend who lives in the area where the Tsunami happened in Japan, is now missing. We are 6 year - "besties". I can't reach her. She doesn't pick her phone, doesn't reply on Twitter or on e-mail. I am very worried and just pray for her safety... ﾉД`)  I really wish that she's alive and in the safe place...

Fortunately, many Japanese people showed calmness in their behavior after this disaster. They don't panic. They didn't complain, blame or criticize. They yielded the supplies, and passed these supplies to children, elderly, or disabled people. I really admire their calmness... I mean it is amazing how these people could remain so calm and tranquil... I think Koreans should admire their calmness... If the earthquake happened in Korea, Koreans would say: "First, I'll save myself, and then think of others...", but in Japan, their motto is:"Others first, and then, I'll have mine."



Maybe someday everything will be Okay. Maybe someday people will meet each other again. And maybe someday, they will remember this disaster and talk about it. But for now, people all over the world are cheering Japan to recover from this disaster, get help, hope, and future. It is okay because we still have tomorrow and future...

Tsunami on March 12th, 2011



After the disaster, people poster in their Facebooks and other personal websites that Japan

actually deserves it. Americans think of Pearl Harbor; Koreans think of how the Japanese did mean and disgusting things to our ancestors. However, I think it is not funny when people actually die.

We can still help them.

Makenaide. Ganbatte Japan!

(Don't give up. Cheer Up Japan! Everything will be okay!)

These Japanese brother and sister dedicated Justin Bieber's Song "Pray" for Japanese after the Tsunami and earthquake 2011...

Is the cafeteria mess a serious problem? Or are we overreacting about it?

Before Mr. Cornman, our Journalism teacher, addressed about cafeteria mess on Thursday March 10th, I didn't even think about it. He mentioned how students don't have pride (no offense) about their circumstances, and just throw away the garbage on the floor or leave it on the table. I've noticed that many students do not just clean up their table after the lunch: they leave their remained side dishes, fruit crumbs on the table.

I think that the cafeteria mess is becoming a serious problem for the school and for the students. However, people don't realize how this problem can cause problems. I think that the students and the school itself have to do something to stop this disastrous situation.

For instance, we can buy more trashcans for the cafeteria and provide more tissues (I recommend wet tissues) so that the students can clean up the table they used after the lunch. By doing this, I think we can stop those crumbs on the table at least. Furthermore, I think that if students have to clean up, I suggest that instead of writing essays during the detention, students who got detention could clean up the trash after school. I think it's a fair deal. By doing so, they will learn how it is difficult to clean up and decide not to do silly things again.

Waiting for the spring...

It is already March! Snow disappeared a week ago; I can see the trees trying to grow their first leaves in the branches. Birds didn't come back yet, but I can still feel that spring is coming.

Why do people like spring? Why do I like spring? Everything becomes alive in spring: new life, newborn babies, new people, new semester in school (of course it only applies in Japan and in Korea), new flowers, and etc... People buy new clothes, try new hair styles, and become active in spring.

So, why do I like spring? I like it because of cherry blossom trees. When I lived  Russia, I couldn't find any of those trees. When I moved to Korea, there were bunch of cherry blossom trees near my school. I mean, to go to school, I had to pass the park, and in that park, there were a lot of those trees.  : )     I was impressed. It was 2006 spring, same year my dad passed away. When I saw those trees, I felt that I have to move on; I have to start a new life.

My dad used to tell me that in Japan there are festivals in spring for watching the cherry blossom trees. When the whole park is covered with those trees, friends, parents, relatives, couples, and even old couples go to see it for a picnic. It is just beautiful. Cherry blossoms usually flourish their flowers in April.

Oh, and also! I've found out that in Japan you can actually see the cherry blossom tree in winter! Called "Fuyu no Sakura" ("Fuyu" means winter, and "Sakura" is the cherry blossom in Japanese, so it would be "the cherry blossom of the winter"), it only flourishes through Japan, and when spring comes, it just goes down. XP

Anyway, I'm really looking forward for spring. The most exciting thing is that I also will have my 2 week spring break!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!! How exciting!!!!!

Maybe I can call my friends and go to watch those cherry blossom trees some day.

This is fashion ♪!

Everybody has a unique style at least. Well, some people who are lazy, just prefer to wear anything such as a very common T-shirt and  very common jeans/pants.

Since I didn't go to Korean schools, I had no idea how Korean teenagers dress up. My best friend Monica, fatherlike existence for me in SPPA, enjoys putting on the "handiest" casual clothes: hoodie-shirt and just conveninet jeans/skinnies. Seo-Jin prefers to wear girlish style, but I don't like those common styles. I prefer something UNIQUE.  

As my friends know, I'm enthusiastically interested in Japanese style. I like Japenese fashion: the Japanese wear whatever they want, wherever, whenever they want. I respect their points of view: they are NOT scared of others' looking at them strangely. I've noticed that in Korea, people look at them with odd eyes if you decide to wear cute red hat in the middle of the fall.

As every teenager in Korea, I wear the school uniform during weeks. I don't like them particularly (the maroon jacket and cardigan just make me sick these days XD) but I have to wear them every day. What a disaster, isn't it?

Sometimes, I'm very jealous of my friend who lives in Japan. Her uniform is so colorful, so vivid, and so unique. She has red bid ribbon than the ties as we do.

But sometimes, I kind of appreciate these uniforms because I don't want to think what to wear to school every day. Waste of time, isn't it?



And although, you wear uniform, you can just wear a unique or cool jacket on it and cover your uniform.

Then, what do I wear on weekends? Well, my friends will know my style exactly. I usually enjoy wearing Romantic Vintage Style. It's nothing but lovely skirt, one piece, or dress. Since I'm quite tall (174cm)  unlike other my friends, people don't look at me as a "girl," so I have to at least look "girlishly."

Typical style of Romantic Vintage is just wearking dress (especially flower or dot patterns) and putting on the cardigan.

This style not only makes you to look lovely but also it gives you more confidence and passion in your life. Furthermore, Korean teenagers commonly, don't wear this style, so by wearing in this style, I feel more unique and "precious".        : )

However, the problem is I'm not as skinny as the models, so if I wear them in the wrong way, the dress would look like it is made for pregnant women... （´ ω `）

At first, my friends were surprised that I liked this lovely style of clothes. In fact, they just expected from me something mature, something that looked sexy I guess??? But, unfortunately, I'm not fan of that [adult-looking style]. I enjoy this style - it makes me look younger at least.

People think of it as Japanese style. Yes, I kind of got inspirations from reading Japanese fashion magazines. Maybe it's because the Japanese wear anything wherever whenver they want regardless of what other people say or think of it.

Sometimes, I buy unique T-shirts and match them with basic color pants or jeans.



To say the truth, I think I spend lots of money on shopping. (＠ﾟ▽ﾟ＠)ノあはは! What can you do? It's just the only way to release stress for me. I'm already in 11th grade, and I get stress from school, my height, my weight, pressure from my grandparents and parents, SAT, TOEFL, APs.... To shop means to be in heaven for several hours. It gives me rest and peace.

Last Sunday, I bought this Pink V-neck T-shirt. It gives you the vintage style, and I think it would be cool to wear it in spring, maybe around April or May. I didn't get it yet ( I ordered it throuth ONLINE, so I'm just waiting for it o(〃'▽'〃)o...).

This is me when I visited Japan last summer.

My cousin who came with me told me that I really looked like Japanese.

My mom bought this dress 2 years ago, but I still like it and wear it every summer since 2009. 

My friends also told me that the way I make ponytails also remind them typical Japanese girl. 

And of course, I took their comments as compliment. `∀`*

Sometimes, when I am really TIRED, I just prefer wearing simple styles but, it rarely happens.. XD

When I can't impress people with my clothes, I pick unique colorful accessories, such as hats or bags.

I always take with me at least one colorful item when I travel because it makes other people easy to find me when they are lost.

Well... People might think I'm crazy for fashion, and I' ll say Yes. Yes. YES!@@!

I AM CRAZY for FASHION. I just LOVE it. And I will always try to wear something new, something unique and vintage style!

P.S. Yesterday, I received my new dress. Quite fits me well :) I'm really satisfied!

Postman to Heaven

On Monday, I was so bored that I just decided to watch any movie. I've remembered that I downloaded on my IPOD <Postman to Heaven> but had no time to watch it. So, I sat down on my bed and began to watch.

Even though I find Korean movie boring or obvious, this movie made me change my opinion.

It was novel, fresh, and whenever each scene passed,

I was excited to wait what will happen next. (·ε·；)

The story is mainly about a couple: a man who delievers letters to heaven and a woman who cannot forget her lover who died a year ago...

(TωT)

Hana lost her lover a year ago, and she just can't forget him. So Hana keeps writing letters to him

and puts them to the red vintage post box that is located at the middle of the green field.

Jejun delievers letters to heaven and delivers peace and love back to people remained on earth.

When Hana meets him, she just thinks he is a mad man, reading others' personal letters. ..

m(＿　＿) m

Jejun tells her that he is an angel and says that he found one letter to some guy, a very mean letter...

Person who wrote that letter just keeps complaining why he died, why he just left her alone on earth...

Yes, as you've guessed, Hana wrote that letter, and she still can't forget her lover. (￣ー￣)

Jejun offers Hana to work with him, delievering messages of the dead to the family who lost someone.

But Hana still thinks hims as the charlatan.

Soon, when they meet again, Hana realizes how kind Jejun was, helping the dead child's mother to accept the child's death.

They both decide to meet in the cafe and read the letters, and solve the wills of the dead people.

They help children to accept their parents' will or help parents to accept their children's wishes.

ゞ(∀＾*))))((((*＾∀)ノ”

As time passes, soon, Hana and Jejun fall in love.

One day, Hana becomes interested hwne when this work will be finished, and Jejun answered: 

"When people realize that the will of the dead was just a trick, then we will be fired." 

And one Saturday afternoon, in the coffeeshop, Hana realizes that even though Jejun was near her a second ago, she cannot see him. And when she comes back, he was just sitting there as usual.

He tells her that only those who cannot accept the death of their dearest can see him. If Hana

cannot see him, then it's the sign that she was forgetting her lover.

My Fear

Everybody has particular fear. If someone asks me what I am afraid of, I would not  be able to answer that question immediately. Why? It's because I have lots of fears: claustrophobia, fear of spiders, snakes, clowns,and fear of getting weight.

Firstly, I just HATE being locked. When I was five, I lived in Russia yet, and Russian elevators, believe me, are not clean and not bright. They rarely have mirrors. I was going to the kindergarten, and it was winter. As usual, I said goodbye to my parents and pushed the button to "call" the elevator. When it arrived, I just went in and pushed No. 1. Boom!  (ノ◇≦。)

The lights went out and it was quiet. I was alone. I couldn't feel or hear anything. Remember, I was only five years old! I didn't have any cell phones. Even though I could call the engineer downstairs through the interphone, I was just afraid... ・ﾟﾟ･(≧д≦)･ﾟﾟ･｡

I think I had waited inside the dark elevator about 30 minutes. Of course, that day, I just skipped the kindergarten (Luckily! ・ε・)

Still, I remember that day: alone in the dark elevator for half of the hour. Since then, I just can't ride an elevator alone, or if I need to ride in, I always check if it has mirrors or not. MIrrors help you to "widen" the sight, so it kind of helps you.

Secondly, I have both Ophidiophobia (fear of snakes) and Arachnophobia (fear of spiders). I know, I mean, I'm sure that I just can't stand those spiders, but I don't know why I hate snakes.

I don't like their hairy 8 legs, their big eyes, and their webs. And also about the snakes... You know how people hate things because they just can't stand them. Yes, this is that hatred. I JUST hate snakes. I just hate their appearance. I know that snakes are made for purpose, but for me, they are just big long worms who bite and it hurts a lot when they bite you.

When I was 11, my dad used to take me to the circus, and when I was there I always liked taking pictures with clowns. Their vivid colors, their big red nose, and their colorful hair - I liked them because they are funny and cute. But, when I came back one evening, I dreamed about clown eating my leg. I couldn't scream : I lost my voice. I could have knocked through the wall - but I couldn't move. It was a nightmare. Since then, I grew hatred toward the clowns in my heart.

  

Finally, as you know, I've lost 16 kilograms through hard effort, exercising diligently every day. Therefore, I've increased the fear of getting weight. My brain, my heart always tells me to stay out of all the sweet things: chocolates, marshmallows, jellys, cakes, and brownies. That fear grew so big that I refused to eat.



My mom became worried, so we went to the doctor. Dr. Lee told me that I was at the beginning stage of anorexia,; therefore, I needed to throw away all those ideas of getting weight and other stuffs. But I was still scared of getting fat and treated as an abnormal girl among all my skinny classmates.

I kind of passed through the hard time: I escaped of getting the REAL anorexia, but still I'm STILL scared of getting weight and becoming fat as I used to be 3 years ago...